The Langoliers are Coming!: Scattered observations

I just had the strangest revelation (this is what drove me to post). I have not, in the 37 days I've been in Germany, consumed or even seen a piece of ice. Isn't that weird? On one level, it's a stupid thing to even notice. But on another level, it seems highly bizarre, like if I realized I hadn't ever worn socks or used the letter E. There are two main reasons for this. The first is mundane and specific to me: I'm somewhat frightened of the freezer in this apartment, so haven't attempted to make any ice myself. Whenever I've opened it, an avalanche of frozen peas comes out. The second, more broad, reason, is that Germans have very different attitudes towards liquid consumption than Americans. I don't understand how they don't all die of dehydration. In America, I probably drink liters and liters of water every day: water is thrust at you in restaurants, available at water fountains every 30 feet, etc. None of this is true in Germany; you have to buy any water in a store and carry it around with you, and if you order water in a restaurant you have to pay for it (and it is wildly expensive: the one time I did this, it cost $3 and still contained no ice). Even at the cafeteria this is true (you have to buy expensive bottled water). So I almost never see German people drinking anything besides beer. Maybe they have humps, like camels, and they all go down to a river every night. So I guess what I should do is buy bottles of water and fill them up at home, etc. But this makes me paranoid because I don't want to ride a bike with water and my computer in my bag. So, in reality, I just remain parched until I get home. Or, sometimes, I drink out of the faucet in the library bathroom, like an ANIMAL, which is very embarrassing when someone comes in, but until they spill their hydrating secrets they will have to deal.

Non-ice-consumption is probably the most interesting thing that's happened to me recently. I did go back to Oktoberfest the other day, with the same people as last time. We decided that we would actually like to see it, instead of just being herded into a beer-tent. I can't say I'm really that much more impressed by it, but there was more going on than I expected. It's pretty much like a state fair in America: the same rides, the same surreal music choices and carnie banter, etc. The only thing I actually paid to go to was a "mouse circus," which sounds, if I'm not mistaken, really awesome. I don't think I thought it through rationally, but I sort of assumed there would be a tiny three-ring circus, and mice dressed up like circus-performers, etc. I thought, in perfect seriousness, "I wonder if they will shoot a mouse out of a cannon." In reality, it's pretty much like going to a petstore. There were three big mouse cages with maybe 100 mice, sans costume. Their special talents included: (1) sleeping; (2) running in a wheel; (3) obviously having sex with one another despite signs assuring us that they were not. This is very much unlike any circus I have ever been to. There were half-hearted attempts to make the cages appear circus-like, but they just made it seem more sad than it already did. German children were decidedly unamazed despite enthusiastic parents who wanted their 2 euros' worth. Most of them just tried to grab the mice, which is obviously not allowed and which caused the mouse-circus employees to bellow in rage. I decided that I would not enter any other Oktoberfest attractions, despite an enticing flea circus, with a sign that was, for no reason, extremely racist.

The best part was probably the art on the rides, which is the same as art on American carnival rides, but I never noticed how interesting they were before because, as a child, I didn't know what a "postmodern pastiche" was. Below are some of my favorites.

This is for a ride called "Techno Power," and I'm not mistaken that's Coolio on the side, and possibly Frankie Muniz with him. I love the guy in the back flipping off the riders. Also they are in space.

This was for a funhouse, and for some reason I found it extremely creepy. It's obviously some version of the last supper, but it seems to be populated with obscure 80s celebrities, plus Jon Lovitz as a waiter, a possible Seth Green eating a sausage, and a sheepish-looking Bavarian man on the right side. There are lots of disturbing details if you look up close. For one thing, there are huge pigs under the table, which you can't really see because of people's heads. Disco Stu there on the left appears to have a dog instead of a hand. The guy/girl in the back (the one that looks like either Siegfried or Roy, who were all over the place at this carnival) is holding a key that says "501". I've looked on the internet, and the only possible reference I can find is that, last January, a woman (from Munich!) was murdered in a hotel room in Düsseldorf, in Room 501. I think this is a clue.